Give Good Feedback

"You're treating me like a dog," my nine year old daughter said the other day. "If you want me to do something, then please ask nicely. And it helps if you let me know why I'm supposed to do it instead of just saying, 'Because I said so.'"

Right on target, that feedback was. And well presented: constructive, respectful, pointed and factual. The truth of the words hit home — and I corrected my behavior. At least for now.

Giving good feedback is an art that few have mastered, judging by the quantity of barking bosses in the business world. Yet it's an art that, practiced well, endears bosses to those they supervise like no other skill. That's because giving good and immediate feedback shows you care about that performance and about that person.

Here are some guidelines for giving feedback.

Get all the facts

Personnel forms

If you don't have the whole story, your feedback will be ineffectual at best, and damaging at worst.

Don't blame or be judgmental

"You just cost us a customer!" Upon hearing such an accusation, an employee will likely lose confidence and become sullen. Instead, describe what you've seen and the effects of the action or behavior. For example: "I notice that you occasionally have trouble handling angry customers, John. Sometimes that makes them even angrier. Why don't we see if we can figure out a good way to defuse anger?"

Provide feedback privately

Few things are more humiliating than for an employee to be criticized in public.

Do it now

A stitch in the performance patchwork quilt now saves nine later on. If you wait to provide feedback, you may talk yourself out of it. Or you may forget key facts or manufacture new ones. And importantly, immediate feedback has the greatest impact on employees.

Focus on the current problem

Address one issue at a time. Guard against the urge to bring up other matters once you get rolling. ("And another thing, Bob. I've never liked how you....")

Lead in gently

Don't begin a feedback session with a line such as: "We've got a huge problem." Or: "I'm really upset. I can't believe you did that." Such openings are guaranteed to cause an employee to retreat into his or her shell, or else start lobbing grenades back at you: "Yeah? Well if you had given me the right kind of software in the first place, I could have done the job." A better alternative: "I think we need to discuss a couple of things. Have you got a few minutes?"

Don't label

This is difficult, but must be done. Imagine you suspect an employee said something that damaged a relationship with a customer. Resist your urge to call the employee inept. That condemns the employee, rather than the act. Again, defenses go up, trust in you goes out the window — and the chance to improve performance is lost.

Instead, say something such as: "I noticed you were having a heated discussion with so–and–so. Was there a problem?" After hearing an account of the situation, you might say: "Maybe there was a different way of handling it. What if you'd said something like....?"

Be specific

Don't say, for example: "You're always late." Say, "You've been late Monday, Wednesday and today. I need you to be here on time so we can keep the line moving."

Attack the behavior, not the person

A construction foreman once said to me, "Do I have to draw you a picture? What are you, a moron?" I hated him from that point forward, much to both our detriments. Things would have turned out differently had he said: "I see you're having trouble. Can I show you how to hold the screw gun to get better results?"

Watch your body language

Another toughie. Your mouth may say the right words, while your eyes are throwing daggers. Or your arms, folded across your chest, are screaming out: "I fear your stupidity may be infectious."

If you need time to relax before giving pointed feedback, take it. Don't deliver it until you're ready to look the person in the eye, smile occasionally and in general, convey a positive attitude.

Listen

Let an employee talk. You might get a different view of the situation, for one thing. But for another, sometimes people talk sense into themselves without your help. "I know I did wrong by not wearing my safety goggles. Maybe I need to put a Post–It note on my locker."

If you can discipline yourself to provide good feedback 90% of the time, you will be paid back in valuable coinage: good humor, high productivity and respect.

Author information: Business owner and HR manager Jeff Olson, a contributing writer to HROne.com, has written nine books on various business topics.

Provided by HROne.com. Copyright © 2001, HROne.com.

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